There are no words to describe the way I feel right now. That’s not cliche.
For those who haven’t noticed, I have been struggling for some time (it’s not chronic, and I do not need drugs) and I was just about coming out of it, and this is the last straw that broke the camel’s back.
The barn burned down this weekend. The losses are too great to list and there are still items that are popping up in people’s minds. All of Brian’s goats are okay, along with the horse, sheep and cow. 8 out of 100 (or so) chickens were lost, 4 turkeys were lost, a good chunk of the barn cats were lost, Bikes, Logan’s tractor parts, Logan’s four-wheeler, Brian’s milking equipment, Thousands of dollars worth of hay and straw are gone, the goat barn is burned up, ugh, and the amount of tools and equipment lost is tremendous. My car is toast as well along with my tassel from graduation I had hanging in the window.
I had trouble expressing my feelings before because they ran so deep, but now, I can’t even think straight with all that as happened. Last night I was picturing the barn in my mind and knowing it was gone left it feeling surreal. And I am just on the outside of the family, so I can’t imagine how everyone else is feeling.
All earthly things seem pretty pointless right now. I go from bored, angry and depressed. And at other times I feel safe, calm and comfortable with my husband and his family. We are all together, healthy and safe. There is nothing left to do but move forward.
Thank You, Lord, for Our Home in Heaven!